My family has always been a close-knit one

Rae

Dear Diary,

My family has always been a close-knit one; our moments are somewhat inexpressible. I have one sister whom I am bonded with by the hip; we are inseparable. Although she has a number of other sisters with whom she has to divide her affection with you can say, that has never interfered with our relationship.

Recently however, we had a spat; those were rare and never welcomed. That spat, certainly, was unforeseen. After the row, I had already long concluded that it was entirely her fault whilst sulking, and had no intentions of apologizing; I can be as adamant as ever sometimes, especially when I strongly believe I have done no wrong.

Although I was dispirited, I would not budge.

My mother, always the mediator and peacemaker, encouraged me to apologize as she felt I was at fault. Of course, my anger was in the way, like an inflated ego, so I was oblivious to that. Me? Wrong? Never.

She was at me for weeks but I was stubborn. I craved normalcy again, but if it meant that I had to ‘resort’ to apologizing, then maybe not, I thought. After all, I still believed I was right. Why should I apologize?

After some time however, I started to give serious thought to the situation. Was I willing to give away something so special over a squabble? Was I in fact, wrong? After pondering, I realized that I said some mean-spirited things and that I had approached the situation in the wrong manner. Not only had my attitude affected my sister, it also affected my mother. I was wrong and I needed to own up to it. (Boy was that hard to do!)

I’m one who believes in apologizing when necessary, but I will admit that at times, it is difficult.

The message I am trying to bring across is that sometimes, our stubbornness can make us lose the things or persons who mean the world to us. For some of us, it may seem like a mammoth task, to apologize—a mountain sized task, we have no interest in pursuing. But, just think; when someone has wronged us, we believe they must apologize in order for the relationship to continue. When we are wrong, we must realize that we should do the same.

I later sent my sister a lengthy message explaining my actions and apologizing for how I reacted; I realized “I’m sorry” alone was not enough. I subsequently apologized to my mother.

I felt the need to share this with you because I know there are many individuals like myself. It is a struggle, I know, but one we must do.

Have a blessed weekend everyone.

Sincerely, always,

Rae A.

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