Depressing how your past can affect your present,
Trapped behind bars with these insecure notions,
Yet trying to make the most of every opportunity,
Remembering that saying time waits for no man,
It’s hard taking in hard life lessons.
Walking into each day guessing who I am,
Standing in front of that mirror
Talking to that insecure reflection of a man,
What are you doing with your life?
As day turns to night
What are you doing to pass the time?
Refusing to see where I went wrong,
Because a man’s supposed to pretend,
As if he’s so strong.
Maybe God made a mistake,
Can’t even seem to see straight,
Vision for this mission has been blurred,
Maybe it’s because I’m crossed eyed and partially blind.
Yet still being able to send in myself as an application letter,
Hoping to get a reply,
But instead they look at my skin,
Trying to figure out what’s beneath,
The point we always tend to miss
Because we haven’t understood,
The basis of the sentence.
Yet they sentence me to their lowest regard,
Because I was looking for their approval,
So they settle for being judgmental.
Began to retrace my steps by putting on the set
Seeing these video images,
But can’t seem to press forward
Because all they mentioned was my mistakes.
Meanwhile myself I was missing,
Kevin gave me homework to see if I was really learning,
Because he knew I would soon make a choice,
By hearing God’s voice,
Not excluding His will,
Yet I will be that one to remain still.
So remind yourself you are fearfully and wonderfully made,
Marvellous are His works and that your soul know well,
My value is not based on people’s approval,
My value is Christ paying my debts that I couldn’t pay.
So though I tip my cap backwards my life isn’t,
But I don’t mind being last,
Because in the word the first will be last
And the last will be first,
And that’s something beautiful.
And something I will always keep saying,
You folks will think I have nothing
But having nothing was sufficient,
It kept my bones nourished and my stomach filled,
And that’s something the rich was missing
And that’s a beautiful thing,
So even though I don’t see myself as I should,
I know He made me and everything He made was good.
By: Radelle Leonce