I had a fight with a male friend who I was, well I am still interested in

Dear Helpline,

I had a fight with a male friend who I was, well I am still interested in. I’m used to seeing my parents fight and I usually get a lot of blows from them when they are drunk. I am not a saint and sometimes I do look for the trouble. I have sworn not to touch alcohol for fear of what can happen and what has happened. I told my friend about some of the things I did under the influence.

The fight happened at a mutual friend’s birthday party. My friend suggested I take a shot and I was unwilling at first but finally agreed. After that, things are blurry for me. According to other friends at the party, I went crazy.

I want so badly to tell him that I know what I did was unacceptable, but I know he may never want to see or speak to me again. How can I even look him in the eye if he ever speaks to me again? —

B.B

 

DEAR B.B,

As someone who has lived through being abused, I know this is a very difficult thing for you to ever forgive, but rest assured that it can happen. First of all, we are happy that you aren’t making any excuses for your actions even though we recognize that your friend did have a part to play in what happened especially afteryou described your past and warned him about what happens when you have a drink.

With that information he shouldn’t have encouraged you to take that drink and you should have been a lot stronger and not give in to the pressure. If you two meet up again be sincere and say you’re sorry.

We will also encourage you to seek some counselling as well,as alcoholism is a disabling addictive disorder that is characterized by compulsive and uncontrolled consumption of alcohol. Now the good news, like other drug addictions, alcoholism is medically a treatable disease.

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